Monday, May 31, 2010

We should be aware , coz. we are responsible for our action , inaction and ignorance too.

Valuable Piece of information

Let's say it's 6..15p m and you're going home (alone of course), after an unusually hard day on the job. You're really tired, upset and frustrated... Suddenly you start experiencing severe pain in your chest that starts to adiate out into your arm and up into your jaw. You are only about five miles from the hospital nearest your home. Unfortunately you don't know if you'll be able to make it that far. You have been trained in CPR, but the guy that taught the course did not tell you how to perform it on yourself. HOW TO SURVIVE A HEART ATTACK WHEN ALONE Since many people are alone when they suffer a heart attack, without help,the person whose heart is beating improperly and who begins to feel faint, has only about 10 seconds left before losing consciousness. However,these victims can help themselves by coughing repeatedly and very vigorously. A deep breath should be taken before each cough, and the cough must be deep and prolonged, as whenproducing sputum from deep inside the chest. A breath and acough must be repeated about every two seconds without let-up until help arrives, or until the heart is felt to be beating normally again. Deep breaths get oxygen into the lungs and coughing movements squeeze the heart and keep the blood circulating. The squeezing pressure on the heart also helps it regain normal rhythm. In this way, heart attack victims can get to a hospital. Tell as many otherpeople as possible about this. It could save their lives!! A cardiologist says If everyone who reads this convey it to 10 people, you can bet that we'll save at least one life.

As how a friend of mine describes himself

kaun hoon mai????

ek ajnabi si duniya mai,ek akela sa khawab hoon mai, sawal se khafa ,chota sa jawab hoon mai, jo na samjhe unke liya "kaun",jo samjh gaye unke liye kitaab hoon mai;

duniya ki ankhoon me chubha sa kanta , sabse nashelee aur badnaam sharab hoon mai;

uper dekho vo dekh raha tumko,usne jisko na dekha vo chamkta aftab hoon mai;

nigahon se dekhoge to kush paoge mujhe,dil se poochoge to dard ka shabaab hoon mai..

Monday, May 24, 2010

Some interesting facts in Hindi

1.
कीर्ति वीरोचित कार्यो की सुगन्ध है।
2.
वही सबसे तेज चलता है, जो अकेला चलता है।
3.
प्रत्येक अच्छा कार्य पहले असम्भव नजर आता है।
4.
एकाग्रता से ही विजय मिलती है।
5.
भाग्य साहसी का साथ देता है।
6.
सफलता अत्यधिक परिश्रम चाहती है
7.
विवेक बहादुरी का उत्तम अंश है।
8.
कार्य उद्यम से सिद्ध होते है, मनोरथो से नही।
9.
संकल्प ही मनुष्य का बल है।
10.
प्रचंड वायु मे भी पहाड विचलित नही होते।
11
कर्म करने मे ही अधिकार है, फल मे नही।
12.
मेहनत, हिम्मत और लगन से कल्पना साकार होती है।
13.
अपने शक्तियो पर भरोसा करने वाला कभी असफल नही होता।
14.
मुस्कान प्रेम की भाषा है।
सच्चा प्रेम दुर्लभ है, सच्ची मित्रता और भी दुर्लभ है।
अहंकार छोडे बिना सच्चा प्रेम नही किया जा सकता।
प्रसन्नता स्वास्थ्य देती है, विषाद रोग देते है।
प्रसन्न करने का उपाय है, स्वयं प्रसन्न रहना।
अधिकार जताने से अधिकार सिद्ध नही होता।
एक गुण समस्त दोषो को ढक लेता है।
दूसरो से प्रेम करना अपने आप से प्रेम करना है।

Monday, May 17, 2010

READ THIS LOUDLY..................

THIS IS THIS.CAT THIS IS.THIS IS HOW CAT.THIS IS TO CAT.THIS IS KEEP CAT.THIS IS AN CAT.THIS IS IDIOT CAT.THIS IS BUSY CAT.THIS IS FOR CAT.THIS IS FORTY CAT.THIS IS SECOND CAT.
NOW GO BACK AND READ THE THIRD WORD OF EACH LINE

Just for Gags....

Laugh Laugh and Laugh.......
Ek sardar darvaze k bahir bandook liye khra tha,his wife asks him"why r u standing here?"
sardar ji bole :"sher k shikar pe ja raha hoon."

wife :"to jaao na!"
sardar ji :"kese jaoon"
bahar KUTTA khada h...!
Ek parrot car se takraya aur behosh ho gaya .
Car wale ne usse ghar lakar pinjare me rakh diya.
Hosh aane par parrot bola:-
Ayella Jail, Car wala mar gaya kya????
Aadmi nadi me doob raha tha,
Bola:- Ganesh ji bachao, Ganesh ji bachao.
Ganesh ji ne suna aur nachne lage.
Aadmi:- aap nach kyon rahe hai??????
Ganesh ji:- mere VISHARJAN me tu bahut nacha tha na.

Pareshaan thi Pappu ki wife....

Pareshaan thi Pappu ki wifeNon-happening thi jo uski lifePappu ko na milta tha aaramOffice main karta kaam hi kaam Pappu ke boss bhi the bade coolPromotion ko har baar jate the bhulPar bhulte nahi the wo deadlineKaam to karwate the roz till nine Pappu bhi banna chata tha bestIsliye to wo nahi karta tha restDin raat karta wo boss ki gulamiAppraisal ke ummid main deta salami Din guzre aur guzre fir saalBura hota gaya Pappu ka haalPappu ko ab kuch yaad na rehta thaGalti se Biwi ko Behenji kehta tha Aakhir ek din Pappu ko samjh aayaAur chod di usne Appraisal ki moh mayaBoss se bola, "Tum kyon satate ho ?""Appraisal ke laddu se buddu banate ho"

I.T. Industry Producing Movie

What if the I.T. industry starts producing movies? Here are some newer movie titles:-
1. Login Karo Sajana.


2. Haan Maine Bhi Debug Kiya.

3. Shaheed Hacker Singh.

3. Password De Ke Dekho.

4. Mr. Network Lal.

5. Terminal Sajaa ke Rakhna.

6. Hackers Ka Raja, Debuggers Ki Rani.

7. Kyonki Mein Debug Nahin Karta.

8. Phir Teri Java-script Yaad Aayi.
9. Hang To Hona Hi Tha !!!!!

Yamraj Joke.......

A MAN WAS SLEEPING IN HIS HOUSE. SUDDENLY YAMARAJ APPEARED & SAID, "GO OUT & ENJOY. NOTHING WILL HAPPEN TO YOU FOR THE NEXT 10 YEARS." HE DID SO & MET WITH AN ACCIDENT & DIED.
ON THE WAY TO HEAVEN IS THE HELL....SAW YAMARAJ WHISTLING N RELAXING.HE ASKED YAMRAJ, WHY DID YOU LIE TO ME.
-Scroll down
>>>>>>>>>> "SORRY SON, Appraisal time, HAD TO ACHIEVE THE TARGET..."

Sholey-2

Gabbar sends Kaalia and two others to Ramgad to
Collect the loot-maar software he had ordered.
They reach Ramgad and start shouting: "Abe O thakur!
Kahan hai wo loot-maar software? Last date to kab ka
nikal gaya".
Thakur [with anger]: "Chillao mat! Jaakar Gabbar se
kah do ki Thakur
Software walon ne paagal kutton ke liye software
banana bund kar diya
hai."
Kaalia: "Bahoot garmi dikha rahe ho thakur? Koi naye
programmers hire
kiye hain kya?"
Thakur: "Nazar uttha ke dekh, Kaalia, tere sar par
powerbuilder chal
raha hai."
Kaalia looks up and sees Viru (Dharmendra) working
on a PC on one
Water tank and Jay (Amitabh) on another, using a
laptop. Kaalia Starts
Laughing and says: "Ha ha... thakur ne freshers ko
liya hai ye log
Programming karenge? In ko to DOS commands bh! i
nahin aate."
Veeru shouts: "Chup-chaap chala ja kutte. Hum log
consultants hain,
Kuch bhi kar sakte hain."
Jay hits some commands on his keyboard, then says:
"jaao kaalia, Gabbar se kahna ki uska
server down ho gaya."
***** AT GABBAR'S DEN...
******
Gabbar: "Kitne bugs the?"
Kaalia: "Do sarkaar."
Gabbar: "Wo do! Aur tum teen. Phir bhi fix nahi kar
sake? Kya soch
Keya aye ho? Gabbar bahoot khush hoga?
Naya assignment dega aur increment bhi? Iski saza
milegi... barobar
milegi."[Snatches an X terminal from Sambaa]."Kitne
sessions hain is
machine mein?"
Sambaa: "Chhey sarkaar."
Gabbar: "Session chhey aur programmer teen. Bahoot
naainsaafi
hai.[logout - logout - logout]. Haan ab theek hai...
ab tera kya hoga
Kaalia?"
Kaalia: "Sarkaar, maine aapka code likha tha."
Gabbar: "To ab documentation kar!"

what hppns when Laloo starts teaching

Laloo ki English Training.....
Laloo ji Bush se 1 monthEnglish ki training leke India wapas aye.
1 din phone aya,
Laloo ji says,"who's speaking?"
Dusri taraf se jawab aya.
"Are Hum Sasura Bushwa Bol Rha hoon."

quizzically urs.....

As I was going to St Ives
I met a man with seven wives
Each wife had seven sacks
Each sack had seven cats
Each cat had seven kits
Kits, cats, sacks, wives
How many were going to St Ives?

secret about life

"life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it"

Friday, May 14, 2010

tete-a-tete b/w a software engineer and his manager( in wednesday's style)

*All of you who have seen the movie ‘Wednesday’... will love these




rephrased Naseerudin Shah Dialogue’s...*





*







Project Manager *: kaun ho tum..??? kya pehchan hai tumhari ?*











Unkonwn Caller* : Kaun hoon mein...mein vo hu jo aaj committment karne se





darta hai, Mein vo hoon jo aaj ghar jaane se darta ha, ye soch ke kahin ghar





wale pehchanne se inkar na kar de...











mein vo hoon jo, aaj job change karta hai to sochta hai ki kahin recession





mein mujhe company se na nikal de..











mein vo hoon jiski biwi usse friday ko dus bar phone karti hai, "kya kar





rahe ho..?? kaam jyada hai..?? thak gaye ho..?? "





mera haal poochne ke liye ya kaam poochne ke liye nahi, MANAGER



saab...





balki vo ye jaanaa chahti hai ki... kahin hamesha ki tarah end moment pe





boss ke bulane pe mein saturdary ko bhi office to nahi ja raha...











mein vo hoon jo breakfast ke time pe dinner karta hai, lunch time pe





breakfast karta hai, dinner ke time pe lunch karta hai.. vo bhi time mil jae





to...











mein vo hoon jo aksar phasta hain





kabhi Interviews ke sawaal mey phasta hai , kabhi Badi companiyon ke jaal





mey phasta hai, kabhi boss aur client ke bawaal mey fasta hai.











Walk-In ki bheed to dekhi hogi aapne MANAGER saab... us bheed mein se koi





bhi chehra chun lijie.. mein vo hoon..











I'm the…..*STUPID SOFTWARE ENGINEER*....